Step Back to Move Forward

If this is the first time you’re reading one of my posts, let me introduce myself. I’m a former teacher, I taught kindergarten in a public school for 20 years, I’m a wife, I’m a Health Coach, and I love helping busy professional ladies reduce their overwhelm and stress so that you no longer have to suffer from debilitating fatigue, irregular sleep, or out-of-control cravings.

This post is about something that may sound counter-intuitive at first AND at the same time, a little on the “cliche-y” side (I’m not sure if that’s even a word).

I know some of you have probably heard this before, “step back to move forward!” That’s similar to “accomplish more by doing less!” Have you ever heard that?

Let me just ask you if any of this sounds familiar to you: You put the company or your job first all the time? Even to the detriment of your own well-being?You do it all, all by yourself, all the time? AND, you feel that that’s just the way it has to be because you’re afraid that if you stop doing it all, all by yourself, all the time, then everything will come crashing down?

And still, you have this faint but ever-so-there inner voice coming from somewhere deep inside you that’s telling you that something’s GOT to change!

Well? Any of that sound familiar? Have you ever heard any of your family or friends say that to themselves? And let’s just be totally real and totally honest here: have you ever said, or thought, any of those things about or TO yourself? You want to know something? I did! And, at times, I still do!

So, here’s what I know about you: (and, let me know if I’m on the right track ok)

You’re very good at what you do.

You’re an educated, top-performer.

You’re schedule is the fullest (that’s actually a secret cause to your crazy schedule)…

You’re constantly taking care of others, oftentimes, to the detriment of yourself.

Any of that sound familiar? On the outside, life looks good and that’s how you love it because that’s how it’s “supposed to be,” that’s how it “should be.” Right?

But let’s just be real here:

Every time you think about taking an hour on the weekend, “busy” happens. Again. Even if you do get to actually sit or lie down or go for a walk, your brain starts thinking about the things you haven’t done and still have to do, you’re mulling over the obligations you have at work or at home, or the kids are banging on the door, so you just can’t really get into the unplug and relax zone. Am I right?

Yes, you’re proud of your work and all that you’ve accomplished there (or are presently accomplishing there) but, what about you?

Are you coming up short? Is your health coming up short?

You’re feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and your heart of hearts knows that something’s off! Your heart of hearts knows that it’s when you’re feeling spent, depleted, and burnt out, you DON’T need MORE productivity, you need more rest! Right?

So, what ends up happening? I’m going to guess the same thing that happened to me and some of my clients that have gone through the “do more so you can catch up” thing: what ends up happening is that you secretly sabotage yourself!

What????

You tell yourself: “I’ll do it when…” and then fill in the “when” with the house is clean.

Or, I’ll do it when… the kids are away for the weekend.

Or, I’ll do it when… I get a vacation from work.

Or, how about this one… I’ll do it when I deserve to do it.

Let me ask you something, When exactly will things be “perfect” enough before you give yourself permission to relax and take care of your own health?

Does the idea of taking some time to take care of your health trigger some kind of fear?

Is it fear that in order for you to carve out time for yourself, you have to stop spinning all the plates. (Which, by the way, in order for all the plates to keep spinning, you actually have to spin each one of them, one at a time — so really, each of the proverbial plates gets your individualized attention. Shouldn’t you be getting some of your own individualized attention as well)?

If your goal is to start getting healthier (for example, sleep better, gain more energy, stop the never-ending food cravings, reduce stress & overwhelm, lose weight, etc) there are things you are currently doing that you’ll have to change. Right?

Getting healthier is like a caterpillar emerging from it’s cocoon as a butterfly… in order to grow into the next version of herself, that caterpillar has to emerge as a butterfly from the cocoon that served her well at one time but then becomes too small for her. She has to leave behind the comfortable confines of the last version of herself.

So what’s keeping you small and stuck in your own cocoon? In other words, what are the things you keep doing that are secretly sabotaging you from pursuing and reaching your health goals? What activities, or even thoughts, do you persist in holding onto, do you persist in keeping on your plate?

It may look like never-ending busy-ness, one day quickly turns into another, it may be unnecessary obligations, or self-imposed distractions. These things keep you busy, that’s for sure. So much so that, you give yourself a “free pass” in order to avoid doing what you KNOW would give you the results you desire. But you’re stuck. You’re stuck in the, “I need do everything — perfectly — for everyone — all the time.”

This is NOT your fault!

Your being stuck in these self-defeating thoughts, that you have to do everything for everyone perfectly is not your fault. This is stuff that’s been handed out, advertised, and perpetuated by society at large. I don’t know exactly WHY and what’s more, I’m not here to analyze that. I’m saying that it really DOESN’T have to be that way!

You don’t have to be stuck in feeling obligated to say yes to, and attend every invitation.

You don’t have to be stuck in the thinking of having to do it all.

This leaves you with no time or energy left to take care of your own self. Of course you’re exhausted!

Guaranteed, that if you could listen to what your body is telling you, you might hear something like, “Chillax woman. Take some time off. Listen, you are at the end of your rope. Invest in your health like you’ve never done before. Time is running out. You CANNOT go on like this.”

Now, I know this can be a little scary. Taking some time off? Investing in yourself? NOT doing it all? Yes, a little scary right? Yes, it IS scary! And you know what? The world WON’T come crashing down because you’re not doing it all, all by yourself, all the time!

You’ve been doing that for years and it’s really not working for you. It’s not serving you, instead, it’s been a dis-service!

It’s time to reclaim your health, your energy, your body, and your time.

It’s time to learn to say “no” to those things that keep you stuck in busy-ness but don’t move you forward towards meeting your health goals; and it’s time to start saying “yes” to what IS going to propel you forward.

It’s time to realize that when we take a step back from the common thinking that more is going to be better, we instead find that we may already have enough.

In reality, we are the most productive when we focus on one thing at a time. Why? Simply because we can give it our full attention. Anything less than “full attention,” means we’re not fully present nor fully engaged. Right?

My invitation to you is to invest in your health, and thus in yourself.

You’ll find that your life will be more spacious. What I mean by that is you’ll have time and energy to do things with the people you love and care about!

If you’re ready to start moving forward by ”stepping back,” go ahead and take a clearing breath and then click right here to send me an email. We can set up a convenient time to have a phone conversation at the end of which, we’ll both know what the next best step for you will be. You CAN do this! You can!

I hope you found this helpful. I hope you found it motivating and inspiring as well!